As many of you know my first born wasn’t a happy baby. We figured out a few things (like giving up dairy) but he was still fussy for the first 19 months of life. I feel like I grew as a mother and parent, and learned so much from that first year of James’ life. But. it. was. horrible! To have a constantly crying baby, that needs to be constantly held and doesn’t sleep well is very very draining in every single way.
James’ first Christmas 2 1/2 months old.
James magically became a happy baby the day we had Gideon. Go figure on that. I worried my whole pregnancy! How in the world could I take care of James AND BABY!! I’m not going to lie, that summer was pretty hard. I had to give up dairy and wheat with Gideon. Gideon also woke up to nurse every 2 hours until he was about 14 months old. No I’m not joking!
Aug 2012 Gideon is about 3 months, James is almost 2. This picture sums up our summer pretty nicely.
I couldn’t put Gideon down either. He cried quite a bit, and if he was happy on the floor James would attack Gideon (out of love) so I had to watch both of them all the time. I had people tell me, “Oh enjoy these years!” “I miss my kids being babies!” “They are so sweet at this age! And then they grow up!” What a joke! I couldn’t wait for them not to be babies anymore!
While I was pregnant with Faith I remember telling my aunt that I wasn’t looking forward to the big black hole I seem to live in the first year after having a baby. It’s not really postpartum depression, it’s just really hard!
But Faith! Faith is different!
She hardly ever cries. And when she does it’s pretty easy to figure out what she needs. James and Gideon like to hold her and talk to her, but when she’s playing on the floor they mostly leave her alone. Oh, which by the way, SHE LIES ON THE FLOOR! I don’t know what to do! I forget to even try and will ask Titus to hold her so I can go do something quick. I feel guilty leaving her on the floor. Shouldn’t I be holding her? Isn’t she lonely on the floor by herself?
I feel sad when I look at all the clothes she has out grown. I finally understand what all those people were talking about! I am totally enjoying Faith as a baby, in a way that I never did with my boys. Some people might judge that statement but if you haven’t had a fussy baby than you really really don’t understand. And to those moms that have had a fussy baby, it’s truly truly worth it to keep having babies until you get a happy one. It is a completely different experience that every mom should have!
Speaking of having kids. I have been very very surprised at the amount of people who assume we are done. Random people at the park, at stores, in church (“I had three kids in three years too! It’s hard but then you are done and they grow up and move away.”). It took me awhile to figure it out, but I think it’s because we have both genders now and most people would stop. Well I guess we aren’t most people. We hope to have more children. We view children as a gift and blessing from God.
Behold, children are a gift of the LORD,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;
They will not be ashamed
When they speak with their enemies in the gate.
Children’s children are the crown of old men; And the glory of children are their fathers.
Not every one comes away from a big family with a good experience, but I did. I love my family and love the thought of having my own big family. We haven’t set a magic number of when we would stop, we’ll just take it one baby at a time. And if babies are really as fun and easy as Faith than we have a happy future a head of us. 🙂